I'm glad I didn't know...

I would have never signed up for this if I had known what it would be like...but I am lucky to be here, and (in some sick way) I am enjoying it (a little).  Every day I go through the same range of emotions; I feel like a complete idiot (several times a day), I believe that there is no way I can actually do this (again, several times a day), and then I convince myself that I can (or I at least have to try).  And then there is the exhaustion, frustration (because my brain doesn't want to hold anymore information), and fear of failing...  Today was pretty tough.  I feel like "the slow medical student", and like school is kicking my butt (really hard).  I'm told this is all normal...what is this...a cult??    They say that you'll probably graduate, if you're still here in December (statistically).  So that's my goal - forget about GPA, or any additional work.  I can live with being the dumbest person in my class - someone has to do it.  I have never been such an under achiever before...   Jen